Paul Van Dik

Paul van Dyk wasn’t always a producer. “I had the chance to work in the studio right at the end of ’91,” he says. “I didn’t know much about the whole thing, but I had a very clear idea of how my music should sound. I realized that in order to make my music I really had to learn everything about electronic music production. It doesn’t satisfy me to sit in the back and say, ‘yeah, that sounds good.’ I really wanted to know how things work. I learned a lot from my co-producers and pretty much the second half of my second album (Seven Ways) was when I was really getting into producing my own things.”


Oh where to begin? "Pretty much the second half of my second album was when I started producing my own things"

WOW. So what were you doing before that? Sitting in the back and saying "Yeah that sounds good" and doing blow off a doughy hookers tits? So who actually produces the crap for mr Van Dik's approval? Well not him anyway. It all sucks anyhow, so I still don't see what the big deal is. Oh, I should learn everything about electronic music production!! Maybe slapping my name on records that other people produce isn't going to cut it. No, it isn't you rabbit fucker.

Holocaust of the Peeps

One of the less enjoyable parts of being a chick sexer is knowing what happens to the male chicks once separated from their more fortunate sisters. Female peeps are whisked off to safe, warm, well-lit places to be looked after and nourished according to individual output maximization schedules. Male peeps, lacking any marketable skills, are promptly macerated, crushed, gassed, electrocuted, drowned, mechanically decapitated, liquefied, buried alive, or thrown into a wood chipper.

Spawn of Iron Maiden

Steve Harris' has a daughter who, being smokin hot as she aught to be, does a bit of singing.
Thats her. (On the left) Her Da's on the right, galloping away on the bass as he's known for.
Dg digga Dg digga Dg...

Now wait, there's a better photo.

Right? Yeah. Either she failed to inherit any of her dad's songwriting genes, or she's just coming of age and hasn't figured out what to write about yet.
She'd do much better to run around on stage screaming and growling like Angela Gossow for a while, at least until she figures out what makes her dad so awesome.